Monday, January 28, 2008

Gone too long

I try, for the most part, to keep this blog happy. Fun. Upbeat. But I can't force the feelings. When I try too hard it just feels fake, and that's not what I'm about. So I guess that's why I've been away for a while. Because lately, I just don't feel any of those things. More accurately, I'd describe myself as an overwhelmed, stressed out, mildly panicked wreck, teetering on the brink of complete burn out. And exhaustion. Which is not to say that there have not been bright happy moments in this long stretch of darkness. There have...but I would dare to say that the bad days have far outnumbered the good. So I've been doing lots of soul searching and deep thinking these past several days, and praying. And trying to rest more, both in mind and spirit.

I thought maybe today would be the day I could finally return in peace to my blog.

I guess I was wrong.

Sigh.

I miss you all.

6 comments:

He who wears the most black wins. said...

Real is the best. Please, I'll order a helping of real with a side of reality. Then maybe for dessert I'll have a tiny slice of honesty.

I love you! I love your honesty! I love that I can usually count on you to lift me up every time you post--and you did it again. You lifted me again. Wanna know why? Because I have been feeling the EXACT SAME WAY lately. Just frazzled, stressed out, exhausted, and a bit overwhelmed with my life right now. That's real. And so are you. Let's share a virtual hug, a virtual pot of decaf (heavy on the delicious creamer), and a virtual laugh at ourselves for wallowing in it.

Oh, Melissa, you make my heart smile, Friend. Feel the love.

Ruby said...

I firmly believe that everything will pass - this time in your life too will pass...
Remember that you baby girl also experiences all that you are feeling. Keep on praying and searching and all will be revealed to you...
Strength and God's Blessings...

Michelle said...

{{{hugs}}}

Since the baby has been born, I've been so tired and cranky, it seems. I like to write happy, upbeat and amusing things, too. I don't like to complain or whine. And so, things had been pretty sparse. About a month ago, I thought that my kids just didn't do anything funny anymore, but I quickly realized that I just wasn't in the mood to appreciate their antics.

{sigh}

Finally, things seem to be getting better for me. I hope they get better for you soon too.

Frances said...

I miss you and your joyful-though-honest posts, too, Melissa. Thank you for sharing your struggles with us - I will keep you in my prayers.

Jody said...

Is it the weather?

I agree with He who wears the most black.

Take care and know that you are not alone.

Jamie said...

I will pray for you. I have missed you. I hope you get out of the desert soon.